- DATES AND TOPICS
WHY
PURPOSE
HOW DOES IT DIFFER FROM A CONVERSATION WITH FRIENDS?
HOW IT WORKS
WHAT TO EXPECT
GUIDELINES
About Us
BOOK FOR FREE on HEADFIRST
DATES AND TOPICS
Thursday 19th of June - Honesty and White Lies
Monday 30th of June - Excess and Abstinence
Wednesday 9th of July - What does 'progress' look like?
Tuesday 5th of August - Us and Them
Wednesday 20th of August - “Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable...”
WHY?
In polarised online discussion and in-person conversation with our own circles, we are feeding into echo-chambers. Have we lost the ability to engage and listen to difference? Can we disagree with strangers and still offer compassion? Do we need to feel heard more than we are willing to listen to others? When polarising views seem to dominate the digital sphere, how do we coexist in the physical realm when we do not seem to be able to find common grounds? Have places of commoning disappeared? Is the only agora Twitter?
On the other hand, we are all engaging in learning about topics far from our reach, we listen to podcasts, watch foreign films, engage with documentaries and maybe even produce our own digital content. But, do we listen only to a recorded voice, published writing and showcased images? Does all knowledge come from specialists, experts or simply people determined to showcase and spread their opinions and experiences?
But what's at grassroots level? Haven't we all had deep discussions with a stranger? Heard the most valuable advice from a friend or changed opinion after being offered an opportunity to reflect? We hold wisdom, we all do. We are limited to our own experiences and everyone we meet expands it. The world will treat us all differently but we cannot begin to grasp how to describe that gap without the contrast of other people's stories. We want to emancipate the knowledge at grassroots level by practicing the most fundamental democratic principle to bring understanding and compassion amongst difference.
PURPOSE
The purpose of the Listening Circle is to create a container to discuss a topic collectively practising active listening and understanding, especially when we do not agree with each other. This means listening without thinking of a response and speaking without attempting to convince others. This is not a debate, it is the practice to listen and feel heard in a space to hold multiple views, experiences, beliefs and opinions.
The goal of the Listening Circle lies on leaving with seeds of thought that we did not bring into the space. The objective is collecting food for thought. There are many nuances between agreement and disagreement but above all else there is the fact that we all live together in the same city.
Practice sharing ideas for individual and collective reflection.
The point is not to reach a superficial consensus, or to fall into wishy-washy relativism.
Instead: appreciate and practice the healthy tensions of difference.
How does it differ from a conversation with friends?
This is a structured space with time to talk and share over tea and biscuits after the Listening Circle.
Our goal is to attract a big diversity of people and bring friendly topics of discussion.
By talking to new people, one is less able to make assumptions thus potentially making one feel freer to voice their views.
HOW IT WORKS?
Each week there will be a different topic.
There will be an initial round where each member of the circle can reflect on their initial thoughts on the topic.
After the initial round, turns will go on demand but no individual will have a third chance to speak until everyone has had a chance
Try to be concise to make sure everyone has a chance to speak again
You are not expected to bring anything new each time you speak, you can reflect on what somebody has said which you agree with, one which you had not thought about or a chance to reflect or add nuances to something you or someone else has brought in.
We will finish by reflecting on a tought, idea or nuance brought by someone else. You may or may not fully agree with it but it’s a seed of thought you are taking with you.
WHAT TO EXPECT
Tea and biscuits. The venue is free, hence ticket money will go to them to cover tea making, biscuits we will bring and mostly to say thank you to them.
A group of maximum 10 people.
We have the venue for 2 hours, we will give people 15 min to arrive, have a biscuit and make themselves a cup of tea and leave half an hour after to finish up after the structured circle.
Time before and after to talk, integrate or awkwardly stare.
GUIDELINES
We’re trying to create a Brave Space
- Principles
Controversy with Civility
Owning Intentions and Impacts
Challenge by Choice
Respect
No Attacks
Principles of Listening: Inspired by (yet different to) NVC, AR, active listening
No interruptions
Attention and presence [for some people this might be stillness and eye contact, others may fidget or close eyes]. Take notes if you need to.
When others are talking we try to listen without thinking of a response, which is usual in conversation
Curiosity instead of assumptions
Ask for clarification — do not assume or project
Speak for yourself (“I…”) rather than generalisations
Give credit where it is due e.g. if you are echoing someone’s previously stated idea
Be mindful of your total talk time
About us
We are Silvia and Caspar. Who we are is not necessarily important and this is not the place to share our CV. But we are Bristol based folks with an interest in people, cohesion, ideas, compassion and polarisation.
Like you, our experience of Bristol is one of like-minded people where we find ourselves seeking spaces that reinforce our identities, ideologies and interests. And possibly like you, we feel disconnected from some of the views we hear about on social media but we acknowledge the fact that we live together and that there are no grounds of commonality to listen without looking away from other people.
Other Blog entries will be posted here.
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